Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Hookers for Jesus

The clouds are rolling in, starting to spit a bit of early spring rain to closeout this perfect April weekend and, I have to admit, I'm happy for a break from the sun. After lots of outdoor activities - pugging it at the beach with Paco, walking the Charles, running errands and hitting some balls at the driving range - it feels good to curl up on the couch for some junky tv and idle web surfing without the feeling of wasting the chance to enjoy some good weather.

I went up and down the tv guide five times and nothing caught my eye. Ugh. Nothing exciting was on; I'd already seen most of the trash on Bravo, MTV and E! and I think I've overdosed on HGTV lately (although my love for Design on a Dime and the like did trigger a nice update to my living room). So I went to On Demand in hopes of discovering a new series to latch onto. My initial sweep of "TV Entertainment" and the premium channels gave me no leads, but I was determined to find success. At last, while browsing "All Television Series," I discovered the fruit of my labors - Hookers: Saved on the Strip.

I knew just by the name that I'd like it, but it was the description that made me fall in love:

"Audrey's story is one of sexual abuse and violence. She is currently hiding out from the "pimp mafia." With daily breakdowns, Annie helps guide Audrey through her emotional roller coaster. Will Audrey make it through the program at the Destiny House?"

Now, I want you to enjoy the splendor of washed up, slightly dirty rehabbing street walkers on your own, but I'll give you a preview: Aubrey, self-proclaimed internet sensation for her sexy(?) viral videos, is struggling to get through her hardcore past and really, really seems to want to go back to hooking. She was really successful and popular right from the start of her "career" because she did all these crazy things that guys liked! Think wearing diapers and that sort of tom foolery. Her knight in shining armor is a sleazy music producer(?) who found her online and was just drawn to her Medusa braids and bird-like voice (think crow). He's bringing her into the studio - which makes her so nervous! - so she can record a cat-like drone/rap that she wrote while she was "doing a lot of ecstasy and acid." I think she'll be a star... pending a hooking relapse.

But it's not all about Aubrey! Ex-hooker Annie started the Hookers for Jesus program back in 2005 after she got out of the game, something I really do approve of - no sarcasm there.

But Annie suspiciously reminisces about her past with a twinkle in her eye - complete with hotty-boom-botty pics to narrate against - in a way that suggests maybe hooking isn't the worst thing. You get to sleep until 4, make a ton of money and party with your girlfriends all the time. But then, you have to remember the pimp mafia and hold yourself back from donning your highest black boots and hitting up your front stoop to see just what makes Annie shine.

Oh, an Annie's husband is a former member of a Christian heavy metal band and he is just adorable and can totally relate to the strippers on a lot of levels.

I'm just loving this show so much!

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